I don%26#039;t know what to do anymore. He knows how much I would LOVE to have a family, but some days he%26#039;ll be like, yeah, lets try, but then when the moment comes he says no. I guess I don%26#039;t understand, he doesn%26#039;t really like to talk about it either without getting upset. Has anybody else been in the same boat? Or have any suggestions?
Thank you!|||Maybe his mind is on the finances? Childern are expensive %26amp; a lot of responsibility. Sometimes men feel afraid because they are the bread winners. Tell him how important a family is to you %26amp; ask him what is holding him back...work on solutions to his fears! Good luck %26amp; he will come around :-)|||Pressuring him into this conversation is not going to have a great outcome.
You need to make sure that you approach it in a calm manner and at a time that is most relaxing for both of you.
I wish the best for both of you|||You both really do need to talk about it. Even if he does get upset. Because you need to know exactly where he stands on this situation instead dealing with him going back and forth. It%26#039;s not fair to you him acting like this. He needs to be an adult about this situation.|||explain to him that you 2 are getting old and to make sure you are proper aged no less then 20! anyway make sure you dont yell but say it nicely that yall getting old and you dont wanna wait till you 39 to havew a baby|||guys get soo fussed up when it comes to babies. they think they wont be free 2 do what they like, or the thought of a preggi wife freaks them out. im 20w an my partner is always here 4 me, but he just assumes im fine, an if im in pain or tired he gets irritated until i have to sit and explain it, then you see him at the kitchen sink cleaning.. lol
i dont knw why they stress, we have 2 bare it all.. they just need to hear the whyning thats all.. lol
just try talking to him, say urready but if he isnt ull wait, ask him what he is concerned about.. and try talking calmly even when he is frustraiting..
GL|||Life is filled with uncertainties.
Is there ever really a RIGHT time to have a child? He seems scared. Many people are afraid of change. If your husband is having doubts then you really need to get to the root of them.
Is he afraid he won%26#039;t be a good father? Did he have a bad childhood and not want to have his child/children endure the same? Afraid of somehow %26quot;messing up%26quot; by not making every correct decision? Afraid of having a lifelong commitment to another human being (besides you ; ) )?
Maybe he doesn%26#039;t feel financially secure at the moment. If you both are working then an income would be lost. Maybe he doesn%26#039;t want thing to change right now. He may want to enjoy his bride for a little while longer. Things DO change a lot when you have a child.
Something you must consider is that if you guys DO conceive and both aren%26#039;t ready for the challenge,commitment and awesomeness of being parents then it%26#039;s going to created unnecessary stress and havoc in your home.
It sounds like he%26#039;s just trying to make you happy by saying, %26quot;Yeah, let%26#039;s try.%26quot;
If he%26#039;s not ready, then he%26#039;s just not ready. Talk to him, pressure-free. Let him know that you love him and want to have an open, judgment free conversation about your future family. Maybe he wants certain things in life before he has a child to raise. many people problems have a lot to do with lack of money and I%26#039;m guaranteeing that $ has at least a part to do with his feelings on having a child. He gets upset because he has very strong feelings about it and he is entitled to them, as you are yours.
I wish you all the luck ; )|||my ex hubby was the same way... i think it is that when we tell them we want one, it scares them and they tend to run away from it!!!! my ex finally gave into it and gave me one and i hope the best for you and that you get your baby.... baby dust to you, and to me too because i am trying to have one again|||sit down and have a good talk with him. Tell him that you really really really want kids and tell him that you are scared too because who wouldn%26#039;t be but that it could take a while to get pregnant anyway and therefore you may as well start trying now for the off chance that it can take you a couple of years. Ask him if he pictures living forever without kids? How would he feel to never be a parent? Then tell him that no matter how scared you are at the thought of kids, diapers, finances etc. . .the thought of never being a parent scares you more. Identify with his feelings too but then say the consequences of not having kids could have on your life. Make it clear, however that you don%26#039;t just want kids for the wrong reasons. I think most men are afraid that the main reason their partners, especially if you are younger, want to have kids is to fill a void that he can%26#039;t fill. That kind of freaks men out. So make it clear to him that all the reasons are right and that if he is waiting for the %26quot;perfect%26quot; time to have kids, there is no such thing because as I said before, it could take a while.
